He can take away my trust, pride, and courage but he will never take away my good looks

I only cheer on two occassions....DAY and NIGHT

-:- If HeAveN iS MiSsIn An AnGeL Then I MuSt Be aLiVe -:-

DiD iT lOoK LiKe I cArEd?¿?.... OoPs LeT mE tRy AgAiN

Why do BOY bands sound like GIRLS?

7/5th of all people do not understand fractions.

if ur HeArT is in ur dReAm, then no request is too extreme

Today i came upon an angel,
i tapped him on the shoulder,
he turned around and it was you

Dont interupt me when I'm talking to myself.

The voices in my head don't like you.

Kitten (kit'n) n: Soft, cute, playful with fangs and claws.

Im so cool i make ice jealous. Im so hot, fire dont stand a chance.

love is beauty and beauty is TRUTH

Hey look on the bright side...
not everyone hates you as much as i do..

Cry me a river, build me a bridge,
then do us all a favor and jump off it

OMG You killed (name) How much do I owe u?

There's a lot of fish in the sea
But you're the only one 4 me

Never say you love me...
Cuz for me love doesn'e last forever

If you're going my way, I'll walk with you.

Should I smile, Cuz ur my friend, Or cry..Cuz that's all we'll ever be?

If you love someone put their name in a circle not a heart, a heart can
be broken but a circle goes on forever

You laugh because im diffrent i laugh because you're all the same

To the world your just one person but to one person you could mean the
world

When I first saw you I was afarid to talk to youWhen i first talked to
you I was afraid to like youWhen i first liked you i was afarid to love
youNow that I love you I m afraid to lose you

whats betta? a lie that draws a smile or the truth that draws a tear?

Last night I looked up at the stars
And matched each one with a reason why I love you
I was doing great, but then I ran out of stars

last night i woz lookin at the stars, then i jus wondered, where the
HECK is ma celing??

Loving U is like breathing...how can i stop

I ran up the door, closed the stairs, said my pajamas, and put on my
prayers. Turned off the bed, and hopped into the light, all because you
kissed me good night

If yOu ReAlLy LoVe SoMeThInG sEt iT fReE, iF iT cOmEs BaCk iT's YoUrS,
iF iT dOeSn'T iT wAs NeVeR MeAnT tO Be

A MiLLi0n WoRDs Would Not Bring You Back, I Kn0w, BecauseI've Tried.
Neither Would A Million TeaRs. I Know, BeCause I've Cried

A MeMoRy LaStS 4eVeR NeVeR DoEs it DiE TrUe FrieNdS StAy toGeThEr AnD
NeVer SaY GoOdByEnbsp;

A Person Who Asks A Question Is A Fool For Five Minutes, A Person Who
Doesn't Is A Fool Forever ...

Love Is When You Don't Want To Go To Sleep Because Reality Is Better
Than A Dream

Our eyes are placed in front because it is more important to look ahead
than to look back

u always stop 2 stare, y not just take a picture??

ReMeMbEr mY nAmE ReMeMbEr My FaCe CuZ tHeRe AiNt nO oThA hOnEynbsp; ThAt
CaN tAkE mY pLaCe

would you catch me if i fall..do you even notice me..at all?

act ur age, not ur shoe size

SMART girls are more interested in having FUN than trying to look perfect

We are the people your parents warned you about

EVIL is just LIVE spelled backwords

You came into my life sent down from heaven,
Now I think about you, 24/7

100 memories, 200 jokes, 300 great times, 400 secrets
1 reason ..... BESTFRIENDS

I am actually quite pleasant...till i'm awake

If you judge people, you have no time to love them

until water cant be boiled, i will always be very spoiled

I kNoW iVe AlWaYs BeEn BlEsSeD CaUsE Im A pReTtY pRiNcEsS

im not a queen, but hey the crown fits

DONT LOOK AT ME IN THAT TONE OF VOICE

i dOn'T sWiM iN YoUr ToiLeT sO DoN't pEe iN My pOoL

this day was a total waste of make-up

dont worry about knowing people, make yourself worth knowing

True friends are loving, true friends care, and at the end the true
friends are always there.

If I had a star for everytime you brightened my day...I'd be holding the
galaxy in my hands

If its a good idea, go ahead and do it, its much easier to apologize
then it is to get permission

you don't fail if you fall, you fail if you don't try to get up.

Theres a sparkle in your eye that only i see, and theres a place in your
heart where only i wanna be

Trying to be popular is not being true to yourself

The only fool bigger than the one who thinks he knows it all it the one
who argues with him

Success comes before work... only in the dictionary

if your happy and you know it .............get out of my house

IN THE COOKIES OF LIFE, YOUR FRIENDS ARE THE CHOCLATE CHIPS

Don't cry over anyone who won't cry over you.

I asked God for a flower he gave me a garden
I asked for a tree he gave me a forest
I asked for a river he gave me an ocean
I asked for a friend he gave me you

never fight with an ugly person, they have nothing to loose

Why does a rose represent love, when a rose always dies?

Your village just called, they r missing their idiot



U r funny, understanding, cute, kind, intelligent, naughty, great, sweet, honest, independent and truthful. In short u r FUCKING SHIT.



1 I wish you were a screen door..... [Why?] So I can slam you all day long!
2 Let's go get liquored up and rape each other.
3 Your place or mine? Tell you what? I'll flip a coin. Head at my place, tail at yours.
4 Chick do now.
5 I'd like to get between your legs and eat my way straight to your heart...
6 Nice legs, lets eat out.
7 Hey! Wanna play war? (replies)WHAT? (you)Yea, I lay on the ground and you blow the fuck outta me!
8 If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
9 You touch her shirt and ask, "Is this cotton?" Wait for response. Then touch down in the crotch area and say, "Oh, this must be felt."
10 Hi my name is (your name), did I mention I have a penis.
11 My dick's been feeling a little dead lately. Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth?
12 Show me your pussy!
13 Are you going to the party tonight (what party?) The one in your mouth, everybody's cumming.
14 If I take off my clothes, will you fuck me?
15 If I told you I had a 2 inch dick would you fuck me? (if she says no) say Good, because mine is 8 inches.
16 I know where there is a good party, they've got liquor in the front and poker in the rear.
17 Oh my God! I think I love you! Now lay down!
18 Hey good lookin', whatcha got cookin'? Nuthin could be finer than the taste of your vagina!
19 I'd rip out both my eyes just so you have more holes to screw me in
20 Dah, wanna see my dink?
21 (silently mouth) I want a fig newton.
22 Do you have a beard on your pussy/asshole? (No.) Want one?
23 Your chest looks a little sore. Would you like me to numb it?
24 Do you wanna lick my tongue?
25 Hello. I have sex on the first date. Do you?
26 Do you like apples? (Yes.) How about I take you home and fuck the shit out of you. How do like them apples?
27 Do you like jewels? (Yes.) Suck my dick, it's a gem.
28 Person #1: hey, you wanna do a 68? Person #2: What? Person #1: You go down, and I'll owe you one.
29 Mean people suck, nice people swallow. I'm nice.
30 Scientists have determined that the average time for intercourse is four minutes. The average number of strokes per minute is nine, and since the average length of the penis is six inches, the average female received two hundred and sixteen inches or fifteen feet per intercourse. Three times per week, fifty two weeks in a year, so, 150 times 18 makes 2700 feet, or just over a mile and a half. If you are not getting your mile and a half, why not let me help out?
31 Tell me how my cum tastes.
32 First, I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then, I'll move up to your belly button.
33 I've got a great big cock!
34 You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
35 Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I like Spaghetti, Let's go fuck!
36 Your lips are kinda wrinkled. Mind if I press them?
37 Do you cheesy lines or do you just want to do it?
38 May i pleasure you with my tongue?
39 Wanna go 50-50 on a rape charge?
40 I have a big headache. I hear the best cure for headaches is sex. What say we go upstairs and work out a remedy.
41 (walk up to the bar and sit down in the seat next to them. While looking at them, order a drink and drink it down) Well, we can't fuck here!
42 Fuck me, I'm beautiful enough to be with you all night.
43 So, Is it safe to say I'm gonna score?
44 Hi I'm (your name) I swallow
45 I just checked my schedule and I can have you pregnant by Christmas.
46 Mines bigger than his want proof?
47 I got a 14 inch cock, why don't you come home with me and I'll let you ride it.
48 You are rubber, I'm glue, what ever you say, I bet I will fuck you.
49 Looks don't matter, I'll just wrap you in a flag and fuck you for glory.
50 I'm like Domino's Pizza. If I don't cum in 30 minutes, the next one is free.
51 I would fuck you so hard, you'd learn from it.
52 Do you like my belt buckle? (any response is okay ) It would look better against your forehead!
53 Do you wanna come to the Marines, or would your rather have a Marine come into you?
54 Happy hour's over but it's still going strong at my place.
55 Whip it out and show me what you got, so I can save the disappointment from later.
56 Do you have any tacos on you? (No.) In that case, will you make out with me?
57 Would you fuck a complete stranger? (No) Then Hi, my name is...
58 Are you gay? (No.) Wow, me neither, let's have sex.
59 Hi. Last night, a little leprechaun came up to me and told me that if you don't have sex with me tonight, your(or my) dick is going to fall off. We don't want that now do we?
60 I'm conducting a survey on the taste of vaginas. Wanna be my first participant?
61 If I washed my dick, would you suck it? (No.) Oh, so you like to suck dirty dicks.
62 Let's go fuck in a brand new limo.
63 Look out in the night sky. You see that bright light to the right of that red one? That is a comet that is streaking toward here at 34546 miles per hour. At that rate, it will be here in about an hour. So, wanna fuck?
64 Life is like a dick. When it gets hard, "Fuck it".
65 love is a sensation; caused by a temptation; to feel penetration; a guy sticks his location; in a girl's destination; to increase the population; for the next generation; did you get my explanation; or do you need a demonstration?
66 Nice fucking weather. Want to?
67 Wanna fuck, or should I call my lawyer?
68 Hi, my name is Guerrermo. I eat pussy like a woman.
69 You remind me of a blue ribbon bass. I don't know if I should mount you or eat you.
70 Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under...
71 I'm not a slut, I'm just popular. Wanna fuck me and be the Big Man on Campus?
72 I ran out of Viagra. Can I use you?
73 Do you know what part of the tongue registers the "salty taste? Why don't you blow me and find out?
74 Excuse me, but I think that you are too drunk to drive. Can you recite the alphabet backwards? [Does it] Next, I need for you to bend over and spell "RUN".
75 Can you lick your nipples? [No.] Can I?
76 Alright, let's go... I'll give you a half hour.
77 I'm not an expert in hardware, but I know that you'd be able to screw my nuts off.
78 (put out hand) Give me five. (after they give you five, leave your hand up) Give me elbow. (after they give you elbow, leave your hand up) Give me shoulder. (after they give you shoulder, leave your hand up) Give me nose. (after they give you nose, leave your hand up) Give me head.
79 Could you do me a favor? Could you get on your knees and smile like a donut?
80 Roses are black, violets are red, what is it going to take, to get you into bed?
81 You've been a bad, bad girl(boy). Go to my room!
82 Ever slept in a $5000 bed? Want to?
83 This is a condom. If we put it on, we can have sex.
84 I'm hard. You wet?
85 I'm a necrophiliac... How well do you play dead?
86 If you won't fuck me, can I fuck you?
87 I'm rubber, your glue. Let's have sex.
88 I WANT SEX! Sorry, the doctor said that would help....
89 You're dead sexy. Get in my pussy!
90 I'm scared of getting pregnant, so do you want to go up to my room & test out all of my condoms?
91 The Lord gave us the power to fuck. So, let's go have sex!
92 If I was a chipmunk, and you were a bunny,...wait, or was it the other way around...forget it, Wanna screw?
93 Sex is evil; Evil is sin; Sin is forgiven; so let's begin.
94 What do I have to do to be your booty call?
95 If you talk to me, I'll fuck you.
96 Do you believe in free love? (Certainly no!) Then how much do you cost?
97 I have a 13 inch dick. Remember that, there will be an oral exam later.
98 (Stare at her until she says "What!?!") It isn't just gonna suck itself.
99 Hey baby, I'll fuck you so well the NEIGHBORS will be having a cigarette when we're done.
100 Thanks for the blow job last night. (What blow job? I didn't give you one.) You didn't? You owe me one.
101 Let's go to your place and love each other until my dick falls in your pussy.
102 I'll suck you so hard that you'll have to pick the sheets out of your ass when I'm finished.
103 Do you train cats? (No, why?) Because you just made my pussy cum!
104 Want to make a porno? We don't have to tape it.
105 Let's face it. I'm hot, you're hot and we both know you got a crush on me. And really, who can blame you with a gorgeous face like this. So can I snatch a kiss or vice-versa (that is kiss a snatch).
106 Didn't anyone tell you that you wanted to sleep with me?!?! I thought you knew...
107 Do you know the difference between my penis and a chicken leg? No??? Well, let's go on a picnic and find out!
108 Excuse me, but would you like an orally stimulated orgasm?
109 Excuse me, have I fucked you yet?
110 Excuse me. Do you want to fuck or should I apologize?
111 Fancy a fuck?
112 Hi, wanna fuck? (No!) Mind lying down while I do?
113 I am a magical being, take off your bra.
114 I love you. I want to marry you. Now fuck my brains out.
115 I miss my teddy bear. Would you sleep with me?
116 I must expel some seminal fluid. May I use your body?
117 I think we have to make love on the front lawn like crazed weasels NOW!
118 I wanna put my thingy into your thingy.
119 I want to thank you for [insert any event here], grab your ankles bitch!
120 I'd like to tie you to a rafter and fuck you up and down.
121 I'd love to swap bodily fluids with you.
122 I'm gonna have sex with you tonight so, you might as well be there.
123 If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
124 Let's bypass all the bullshit and just get naked.
125 Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.
126 My name's [your name], but you can call me "lover."
127 My name's [your name]That's so you know what to scream.
128 Nice shoes, wanna fuck?
129 Nice socks. Can I try them on after we have sex?
130 Nice tits. Mind if I feel them?
131 NOW, BITCH!
132 Oh, you're a bird watcher....(Whip out your unit and ask) Well, would you take this for a swallow?
133 Sex is a killer...want to die happy?
134 Since we shouldn't waste this day and age what you say we use these condoms in my pocket before they expire.
135 Take an ice cube to the bar, smash it, and say, "Now that I've broken the ice, will you sleep with me?"
136 Take off that dress and fuck my brains out, you cave newt.
137 The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor.
138 The word of the day is "legs." Let's go back to my place and spread the word.
139 Wanna fuck like bunnies?
140 We're going to dance to one song, then go back to my apartment and fuck.
141 What can I do to make you sleep with me?
142 What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.
143 Your face or MINE!?
144 Your place or mine?
145 (Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.
146 A women asks, "Excuse me, do you have the time?" You: "Do you have the energy?"
147 Are you free tonight or will it cost me?
148 At the office copy machine "Reproducing eh?" "Can I help?"
149 Baby, I'm an American Express lover.... you shouldn't go home without me!
150 Brrr! My hands are cold. Can I warm them in your heaving breasts?
151 Can I flirt with you?
152 Can I please be your slave tonight?
153 Can I see your tan lines?
154 Can you believe that just a few hours ago we'd never even been to bed together?
155 Cold out isn't it? (staring at breasts)
156 Congratulations! You've been voted "Most Beautiful Girl In This Room" and the grand prize is a night with me!
157 Do you have a mirror in your pocket? (Why?) 'Cause I could see myself in your pants.
158 Do you know the difference between a hamburger and a blow job? No! D'ya wanna do lunch?
159 Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? (No.) Do you wanna go upstairs and talk.
160 Do you know what'd look good on you? Me.
161 Do you know, your hair and my pillow are perfectly color coordinated.
162 Do you like short love affairs? I hate them. I've got all weekend.
163 Do you mind if I stare at you up close instead of from across the room?
164 Do you spit or swallow?
165 Do you wash your panties with Windex? Because I can really see myself in them.
166 Ever tried those weird prickly condoms?
167 Excuse me, ma'am, is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?
168 Excuse me, miss, do you give head to strangers? No. Well, then, allow me to introduce myself.
169 Go up to a girl in a bar, and slip your arm around her, and say, "Hi Laura!" She says, "I'm not Laura!" And you say, as your hand slips a little lower, "But you sure feel like her!"
170 Ask: "Do you know what winks and screws like a tiger?" (No.) Wink.
171 God must have been in a very good mood the day we met.
172 Have you ever played leap frog naked ??
173 Help the homeless. Take me home with you.
174 Here's a quarter....call your roommate and tell her you won't be coming home tonight.
175 Hey baby, are you a glover? NO? Well, I am, wanna wear me?
176 Hey baby, let's play house, you can be the door and I'll slam you!
177 Hey! Ya wanna try out my new 'Home Artificial Insemination Kit?'
178 Hi, I need your help! My mom says that if I don't get a date by tomorrow, she's putting me up for adoption.
179 Hi, I'm new to this country and you are the prettiest sight I've see so far. Can you give me a tour of your body?
180 Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.
181 Hi. Are you legal?
182 Hi. You'll do.
183 How about you and I go back to my place and get out of these wet clothes?
184 How do you like your eggs cooked? Why? Well I just wanted know what to make for you in the morning!
185 I had a friend who used to hand out phone cards that said: "Smile if you want to sleep with me." And watch them try to hold back their laughter.
186 I had a wet dream about you last night. Would you like to make it a reality?
187 I like your butt, can I wear it as a hat?
188 I think I could fall madly in bed with you.
189 I wanna floss with your pubic hair.
190 I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hand.
191 I wonder what our children will look like.
192 I would kill or die to make love with you.
193 I would say that I'm in love with you, but you'd think I'm trying to pull a fast one.
194 I'd like to name a multiple orgasm after you.
195 I'd look good on you.
196 I'll cook you dinner if you cook me breakfast.
197 I'm an organ donor, need anything?
198 I'm Irish. Do you have any Irish in you? Would you like some?
199 I'm leaving this place. Do you want to come?
200 I've got a condom with your name on it.
201 I've got a pimple on my butt, wanna see it?
202 I've got the ship, you've got the harbor...what say we tie up for the night?
203 If I gave you a sexy negligee, would there be anything in it for me?
204 If I was Elvis, would you screw me?
205 If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?